XO
by dave-d
Summary: Naruto found a piece of paper. It had the letters X and O. It had his name. What did it all mean?


**A/N:**

_This story takes places after events in the latest manga. It contains snippets of the latest canon that might be spoilers to those who do not keep up with the official story._

x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x x

Birds were chirping.

The sound was a cheerful counterpoint to the widespread sound of hammers, saws, and masonry mallets.

The squeak of pulleys was a louder version of the noise made by the mice that gathered around the huge bags of rice and wheat that were awaiting distribution.

The sound of life and the sound of labor. The one was a bright and summery reminder that life finds a way, even after something as devastating as Pain's attack. The other served to show how much a community can come together in a time of need.

New births were on the rise again. Shinobi and civilians alike were pitching in to help a newer better Konoha rise from the rubble. The elderly were treasuring their lives more than before. Men dressed in worker's leather and women carrying large jugs of water wiped the sweat from their brows, proud of the duties that they took part in.

There was more than life. There was more than labor. There was also love. And, not just the love of life or the love of labor. People were more civil with one another. There was a resurgence of kindness, consideration, and trust, even though the actions of the disgraced Danzo and his Root henchmen could have left the populace feeling angry and confused. The tidal swell of positive emotions was a credit to Hatake Kakashi, the Sixth Hokage. But, an equal if not greater share of credit lay with another individual. That individual was never thought as a credit to the Leaf before his actions against Shukaku and Gaara-of-the-Winds. That individual would forever be seen as a credit to the village after his first big-stage use of Sen-jutsu.

"It's such a wonderful day!" Naruto walked through a newly built neighborhood, treading on a fresh set of cobblestones gathered from the rim of the crater caused by Deva Pain's _Shira Tensei. _"I wouldn't mind a mission or two, though!" He looked down at his hands, frowning when he saw fresh and healed blisters. "I don't need a baby sitter" While Madara and Akatsuki were kaput, there were still shady characters willing to make attempts at collecting Biju. Killer-Bee had escaped two attacks in the past few weeks, or so the latest batch of scrolls from the Leaf's allies claimed.

Naruto's complaining was only half-hearted. Not only did a little labor here and there help to build muscle and give him reason to strut back and forth in front of his full length mirror, it also gave him a great opportunity to mix with the men and women who made up Konohagakure. In the past, that was nearly unthinkable. Aside from his fellow shinobi and a double handful of treasured friends like Ayame and Teuchi, there were few people that the orange and black-clad ninja could let his emotion guard down around. Before his emergence as a savior of sorts, there were still nights when he would abruptly wake and sit up, drenched in sweat, hand grasping his night-shirt or frog-cap. The nightmares he had as a young boy had a habit of showing up uninvited. Those dark and dreary dreams always showed huge distorted figures shouting hateful things at the little boy with a Fox inside.

"Thank you!" Naruto stuffed a handful of apples inside his jumpsuit. That was a princely gift those days, and were handed to him by a wizened old woman, one with few teeth remaining in a smile expressing with gratitude and good cheer. Passing a group of small children, he took the fruit back out... created three _Bunshin_ to juggle it... and then handed it to youngsters after polishing it to a wondrous sheen. "You're welcome," he told the thankful munchkin, who immediately began following in his footsteps. It wasn't unusual for him to have a crowd surrounding him those days. "You guys need to eat well if you want to grow up to be big strong warriors!"

"Naruto! I baked a number of pies, would you like one?" "Naruto, would you like to try my new kind of Ramen?" "Naruto, how about some squid on a stick, my treat?" "Naruto, have you met my daughter?"

"Uhhh... well...." For every few offers of food or drink, there was an opportunity to simply speak to people he had never met before. Some of those _tête-à-tête_ and _vis-à-vis_ were more contrived than spontaneous. The future Hokage was a heartthrob to some young ladies, and a great catch as a son-in-law to over-eager parents. He was learning to deal with adoration of the good type, as well as idolizing of a less sanguine nature. That was good training, for a boy who wanted to wear the Tri-Corner hat some day. "Pleased to meet you." He nodded politely to a smiling girl dressed in her best clothes. He shyly mumbled an excuse after speaking a short while.

Naruto was getting adept at life. He had never been a stranger to working hard. But, if there was one part of his being that was woefully neglected and under-developed, it was his experience with love. Simply thinking that word, after his encounter with the blushing daughter of a politically motivated store owner, had him sighing. Why so melancholy? Thinking about courtship and couples had him wondering about his parents. Minato Namikaze. At least he knew something about _him_. But, Kushina Uzumaki, kunoichi from the former Land of the Whirlpool? He had never been able to get people to talk about his mother, and that left him feeling hurt and lonely whenever he brought the subject up.

"What do _I _know about love?" Naruto spied more father-and-daughter tandems up ahead. That had him ducking down a temporary alley way near a recently constructed lumber mill. Wading through wood ships and avoiding occasional discharges of slurry, he was too anxious to feel silly or cowardly. "I haven't had much luck with crushes." That much was true. Everyone knew how he felt about Sakura. At least, how he had felt before. The village's noisiest and most unpredictable ninja had mixed feeling about his teammate at the present time, after her fake confession in the Land of Iron. "I wish there was someone who could like me for _me_." Something tugged at his memory, but couldn't get his full attention. "If she can finally let go of Sasuke...." He stopped and placed his forehead against a cold utility pole. Some things were easier said than done. He himself hadn't lost the desire to save Sasuke, even though he had been the one who brought the missing-nin in for judgment.

"At least I have a group of great friends!" His bubbly nature could not be kept down too long. He was like a bottle of soda: sometimes he might seem flat; but, shake the bottle, pop the cap, and a fountain of bubbles would spurt out. "There will be time for love, later."

Love.

He had a heart full of love.

At least, love of a particular type. He loved his friends... and the townspeople... with love larger than the five stone faces placed side by side. He felt their love in return, always assuming it was platonic in nature. Maybe that was the reason that he continued to over-look something noteworthy. That, or the fact that there had been ample reason to be distracted when had was pinned to the ground by chakra rods, after having seen Pa-frog killed and after he himself had fallen prey to Deva Pain's _Basho Tenin_. No, it might have been the sight of Hinata being sent flying by her target's _Shira Tensei_, and his thinking that she had been killed by one of those damned spear-like projections. That had been the rod that broke the camel's back. He had transformed into his six-tailed form, seething with the worst emotions he had ever felt. Those emotions may have overwritten the explanation that the girl gave for her suicidal actions.

The memory that tugged tentatively at his cerebral neurons had to do with that dramatic entry by the very same Hyuuga girl. The other shinobi in the combat zone had been keeping out of Naruto's way, and had been told not to do anything rash. Hinata had been following suit, until it looked like her precious person was helpless and about to be stolen away. Seeing Naruto prone and hopeless, she had come running, placing herself in contention with the worst enemy that Konoha had ever faced.

_Deva Pain: Reinforcements, eh?_

_Hinata: I won't let you lay another finger on Naruto._

_Naruto: What are you doing here? Get out of here! You're no match!"_

_Hinata: "I know... I'm just being selfish...."_

_Naruto: "What're you talking about? What are you doing here!? It's dangerous!"_

_Hinata: "I'm here of my own free will... I used to always cry and give up... I nearly went the wrong way... but you... showed me the right way. I was always chasing you... wanting to overtake you... I just wanted to walk with you... I wanted to be with you. You changed me! Your smile saved me! So I'm not afraid to die protecting you!!"_

The shocking confession came next, just before the white-eyed kunoichi performed _Jusho Shoshiken,_ creating beast-head shapes of force around her fists and leaped at an unconcerned Pain.

_Hinata: "**BECAUSE I.**.. **LOVE YOU.**..."_

Yes, he might not have been touched by that confession because he was caught up in a overwhelming life or death struggle. Or, his busy mind might simply had translated things incorrectly. He had a great love for his friends It was not a romantic love, but love just the same. Maybe he had mistakenly construed Hinata's love to be something of the same sort. Or, maybe it was because he had never viewed Hinata in a romantic context, and simply brushed off her words like he brushed an errant wood chip off of his shoulder. Who could say? And who might know, whether those last four words might stay buried in the back of his mind forever?

"Huh?" Naruto looked down at one shoulder and cursed under his breath. "Yuck!" One of the chirping birds had flicked its tail and dropped a rather large glob of bird shit on his jumpsuit. It was no doubt a coincidence. But, if there was such a thing as Fate, the ornery Norn or Kami might have been blowing figurative raspberries, miffed at the young man who had been oblivious to the feelings of a certain young lady. "Girls want me. Guys want to _be_ me...." He picked up a wind-blown piece of garbage and wiped the offending mess from his clothing. "...Birds want to crap on me. Great!"

Seeing something flying towards him, and getting ready to duck if it was bird heading his way, Naruto struck up a fighting pose, ready to dodge when necessary. Without thinking, he moved like lightning, snatching something out of the clutches of a powerful gust of wind. It was a piece of colored paper. He started to crumple it up, in preparation to dropping it into one of the nearby waste bins.

"_Hmmm-mm-m_...." His curiosity got the better of him. There was a proverb, 'Curiosity killed the cat,' meaning 'Mind your own business. Being nosy and getting yourself involved in unnecessary things can lead to problems.' But, foxes are canids, not cats. Right? "I wonder...." He unfolded the wind-bent piece of parchment. Before reading it, he took a sniff. Was that perfume? The scent of a woman? "Huh!?" There wasn't much written on the paper. The was an 'X' and an 'O', next to one another. Leading away from the 'O', there was a line that suggested the parchment had been pulled away or caught by the wind before the author had finished writing. There was also a name. "Why is _my_ name on this?" That was the first question that crossed his mind. The second was: what does the 'XO' mean? He scratched his head.

For a second time, he considered tossing the paper into the trash. It might simply be an unfinished note from one of those wannabe girlfriends. If that was the case, maybe he should blow his nose on it or wipe his butt! He frowned. No need for crude thoughts.

"No need to be hasty, I guess." Naruto shrugged, and then sidestepped just in time. He was standing under a newly-strung power line. There were dozens of birds lining the wire, causing it to bow precariously. Bird dropping fell like rain. "Missed! Feathered rats! Losers!" Making an 'L' shape with his fingers, he should have walked instead of talked. This time two bird bombs tattooed his sleeves. Many more barely missed him. "This just isn't my day!" He fought the urge to frog-up and toss off a _Rasenshuriken_ ,or create a street full of shadow clones, slings in hand. That wouldn't be very Hokage-like.

"Naruto." Sai walked up. He shook his head when Naruto asked if Yamato or Sakura was looking for him. There was no mission. "What is that?"

"_This?"_ Naruto frowned, wondering what the former Root ninja was referring to, until he realized that his hand still gripped the scented paper. "O! I saw it blowing in the wind." He opened it and showed it to Sai, turning his body in an unsuccessful attempt to block the swirling winds. He sputtered when a piece of trash flew into his open mouth. "Ugh. Pttui. Bleh." He spat. "It has my name on it."

"Ah." Sai scrutinized the paper. It was his baliwick, after-all. Papers and ink. But, not perfume. "I detect a feminine odor. Is that yours?"

"No!" Naruto made a face. "Of _course_ not!" Sometimes Sai asked the stupidest questions. Of course he wasn't wearing parfum. "It's on the paper!" Stung by his friend's query, he immediately switched over to 'Ignore Sai' mode. He wasn't the only person in the Village Hidden in the Leaves who had just such a mental setting.

"I see," Sai stared at the paper, wondering why his teammate pulled it away from view. "Those markings...." He had seen them before, during one of his many visits to the old library, back when he made great efforts to read about human behavior.

"Good!" Naruto caught sight of another familiar face. "Hey! Choji!" His rotund buddy had marched around a corner, carrying a large bag of snack items.

"Naruto!" Choji slapped his friend on the back and offered him a bag of Freeze-dried frog chips. "O! Sorry! How about these instead?" He held up a box of bird-shaped cookies. Naruto gladly took a handful of those, biting off the heads before finishing them off. He felt somewhat sheepish realizing what he had done. He almost expected a squawking flock of feathered-avengers to appear.

Naruto showed Choji the paper. "Do you have any idea what these markings mean?"

"Let me think. _Hmmm-mm-m_." He finished off the box of cookies. "That might be it!" Food was his specialty. "XO sauce. A really great sauce made from chopped dried shrimp, fish, and scallops that had been cooked with chilli, onions, garlic, and oil." He licked his lips. "The name came from really good cognac... _XO_ for extra-old." His face fell when he realized something. Not only had Asuma been a perpetual smoker, he had often enjoyed a cigarette while sipping on fine liquor.

"You mean you think somebody might have been writing out a grocery list?" Naruto yawned and stretched, before returning to sleuth work. "That would mean that someone was going to have me run errands that would better fit academy students. Or... maybe...." He put his hands on his hips. Maybe it was one of those relentless girls! Could one of them have intended to cook him dinner? "I'm not so sure that makes sense."

"No. That's not it. I believe...." Once again, Sai was treated like a red-haired step-child.

"You can ask Shikamaru! He finally showed up!" Choji pointed over to his best friend, who was headed in their direction. "Now we only need to find Ino."

"There you are. I was waiting for you at the restaurant. I didn't expect you to buy snacks before dinner." Shikamaru noticed that one of the snack boxes was empty already. "Naruto! Sai! What are you guys up to?"

"I'm trying to figure out the XO," Naruto replied, passing the paper to his genius friend.

"I suppose XO could stand for Executive Officer," Shikamaru said. "Some of the jounin use that term. Another possibility would be Executive Order. I doubt any type of government edict would be hand-written on pink perfumed paper." He looked up at the sky. It was overcast. There would be no cloud-watching today. "If that line was meant to be _between_ the two letters... making it an X/O...." He bent down and drew the figure in a patch of drying mud. "...That would make it division by zero. That is unlikely, and very bothersome."

"Bothersome?" Choji was chewing again, pork-rind crumbs blowing from his lips. "Why?" He saw the face his friend made. But, he wasn't going to let that stop him. It was the principal of the matter. The more often that his taciturn friend got away with the 'It's too troublesome' answer, the more often that conversation-killer raised its ugly head. "Come _on_, Shikamaru!"

"It's not necessary," Sai interjected. "The answer is...." He was not about to make an observation on division by zero. He was simply going to solve the mystery of the XO mark.

"But...." Shikamaru glanced at Naruto. He winced when the jinchiruki shouted 'Hey! I'm not stupid! I'll understand.' Naruto had helped Shikamaru solve a cipher left behind by Jiraiya on Fukasaku's frog body. It wouldn't hurt to offer explanations regarding this mysterious piece of parchment. "Alright. But... Choji... it means that _I _get the last piece of beef this time. Or _you_ pay the full bill!" The brilliant ninja waited until his closest companion reluctantly agreed. "It's possible to disguise a specific case of division by zero in an algebraic argument. It results in a spurious proof."

"Spurious proof?" Naruto bit his lip. He had just proven himself ignorant. Then again, both Sai and Choji looked understandably confused.

"I'm not going to explain _that_, unless _you_ want to buy dinner." Shikamaru folded his arms across his chest, resuming his discourse when Naruto held up his hands. "First, one makes the basic assumptions that zero times one is zero, and zero times two is zero. The following must them be true: zero times one equals zero times two." He almost stopped when he saw his friends' eyes glaze over. "Dividing by zero would give zero-over-zero times one equals zero-over-zero times two. Simplified, that would give the answer 'one equals two'."

"Well... the chips today were two for one. You know. Buy one, get one free." Choji's attempt at humor did not sit well with his testy teammate.

"The fallacy is the implicit assumption that dividing by zero is a legitimate operation." Shikamaru rubbed his weary eyes. "Just like it's a fallacy to expect...." He didn't finish his sentence. There was no need to belittle his friends. And, to be fair, he had been the one to bring up 'X/0' in the first place, knowing that it couldn't possibly provide the answer that Naruto sought. "Choji, let's go find Ino. Shizune doesn't give her a long lunch break. You know what happens if we keep her waiting too long for us!"

With that, Shikamaru and Choji took their leave. Another friend arrived moments after they left.

"**Ahhhh-hhh-hh-h!"** Lee slid to a stop, windmilling his arms when he slipped on a slick spot. "Naruto! Sai! Hello!" He then asked if either had seen Guy, Neji, or Ten Ten. He had lost track of time, running laps around the village perimeter after failing some sort of personal test. "XO? I've seen that somewhere before...."

"So have I," Sai said. "It...."

"**Ohhhh-hhh-hh-h!** That was where!" Lee struck up a nice-guy pose out of habit. He had read about a particular disorder in a medical magazine. He hadn't been preparing to talk shop with Sakura. She still avoided him like the plague, much to his disappointment. No, it had been out of boredom, back when he had been convalescing in the hospital after Tsunade's corrective surgery.

"_Where _was where?" Naruto felt a sense of anticipation. Was he finally going to learn the answer? The question had taken on a life of its own, it seemed.

"Turner Syndrome!" Lee nodded his head. "I learned about it in the hospital." He had read a lengthy treatise on chromosomal disorders, happy to find that none of the listed abnormalities produced people with overly large eyes like his. "XO instead of XX. I mean... ummm...."

"Sex chromosomes," Sai added helpfully, wondering why Lee was turning red in the face and taking a sudden interest in his footwear. "One X and one Y for males. Two X's for females. In Turner Syndrome... also known as _Gonadal Dysgenesis_... all or part of one X chromosome is missing, or involved in mosaicism....."

Both Naruto and Lee mouthed 'mosaicism' and stared at Sai.

"You know about Turner Syndrome," Sai said to Lee after he was done with his explanation. "That means you know about sex chromosomes." He cocked his head. "Does that also mean that you are interested in sex... as in sexual relations...."

"**Uh!"** Lee gasped. It was weird, hearing such a brief utterance from him. When his eyes regained focus, he blurted out "Must... find... Guy... sensei...." He began walking stiffly. The more fluidity he regained, the faster he ran.

"None of that makes sense, either" Naruto said, coming close to losing his grip on the paper. "Damn. Why did I find this thing. I might as well ask the stupid fox while I'm at it." He paused and swallowed hard. He had felt a weird disturbance behind his navel. This was neither the time nor the place to find himel standing in front of that figment cage, having a heated conversation with that figment fur ball. His stomach rumbled again, louder this time. Maybe it was all the food that he had eaten, handed to him by the townspeople.

"Do you need a laxative?" That, naturally, was Sai. He too had heard the seismic sounds. "If so, there is an apothecary in the basement of _that _building." He pointed at one of the newly constructed shops across the way.

"**SAI!**" Naruto's temper flared. "**I**... **DO**... **NOT.**.. _**NEED**_... **A.**.. **FREAKING**... **LAXATIVE!!!**" He was about to say that his smiling companion could use an enema tube shoved up each nostril, so he could flush all of the useless shit out of his head.

The dead silence caught his attention. Swell! Just great! Everyone in the street had stopped. They were looking his way. One woman was leaning out of her house window. Distracted, she dumped her baby's bath water on a passing monk, leaving large droplets clinging to his freshly-shaven scalp. Luckily, the baby hadn't been in the bassinet!

"I have some prune juice," A spry octogenarian offered. "It contains a laxative, and is a great source of daily fiber!"

"I have some mineral oil!" A passing pharmacist held up a bottle. "It's a lubricant. Helps the stool get slippery so it can slide on out!"

"You can have my broccoli!" An impossibly small woman carried an incredibly large basket of green vegetables on her head. "It's really good roughage. Nothing's too good for our hero!" That had numerous people making offers.

"Don't forget stool softeners!" That was a young boy that looked and sounded uncannily like Sai. The pint-size ninja had been one of the last Root inductees, before the group had been declared null and void. "Those types of product enable greater amounts of water and fat to be incorporated in the fecal material, making it easier to move along. Many such liquids quickly produce a tolerance effect and thereby become ineffective with long term use. Their strength lies somewhere between that of the bulk producers and the stimulants, and they can be used for patients with occasional constipation , or with ano-rectal conditions that make passage of a firm stool painful." Naruto closed his eyes and counted to ten. The world did _not _need another Sai!

"Only one person I know can cause a gathering like this!" That cheerful claim came from Kiba.

"**WOOF!!!" **Akamaru agreed.

"I concur," Shino added, walking with dog and boy.

"Hey everyone!" Naruto was glad to have a distraction. He had almost forgotten the problematic piece of paper again. He held the parchment towards was Shino, the one closest to him. "So... do you have any ideas... what the marks on this mean?"

"XO. I have seen those letters in close juxtaposition numerous times." Shino pushed his glasses further up his nose. "The XO sex determination system is one that chakra bugs, wasps, bees, ants, grasshoppers, crickets, and cockroaches use to determine the sex of their offspring." He wondered why Naruto was making a face. Could it be that he did not recognize him again? Like that day when the other boy had returned to the village after his journeys with the Toad Sage? "Ahem! I am Shino, if you hadn't guessed." That had Naruto looking baffled. "There is a single sex chromosphone. X. Males have one X. Females have two. Of note... in humans... having only one X chromosome-"

"Turner Syndrome. Sure. I know." Naruto made a dismissive motion with his hand.

"We already had a sex chromosome talk," Sai mentioned. "It had Lee running off suddenly."

"Hah! That's no big surprise!" Kiba chuckled and swiped the paper from Shino. His eyes widened. "I recognize this." He knew what the XO meant... or, what a group of X's and O's would have meant if he had given Hinata a chance to finish writing.

Hinata had been selected as a nanny for the village orphans, and was in the middle of a break period when Kiba had happened upon her. Sipping on a cool box of juice, she had been doodling in her notebook. It was something she tended to do after telling the children romantic fairy tales. Her sketches never made their way into actual notes or letters. They were merely a more tangible part of her daydreams.

Kiba had needed a piece of paper pronto, so he could scribble down the phone number of a cute girl. Without asking, he had grabbed the top sheet off of Hinata's notebook. When Akamaru had jumped up to grab the paper, it slipped from Kiba's hand and flew away.

"You know what those marks mean?" Naruto stood straighter. Bingo!

"I can tell you _who_ knows," Kiba offered slyly. "Its her paper, after all."

"Who!?" Naruto was hopping from one foot to another, looking like he needed to pee. He didn't.

"If you need to micturate...." Sai could have simply said 'urinate'. No, he could simply have stayed silent.

"**SAI.**.. **PUT A SOCK IN IT**... **NOW**!!!" Naruto fought to regain his cool, doubly so because he saw the amused look in Kiba's eyes. Luckily, the crowd did not pick up the ball and run with it this time, offering him all sorts of containers to piss in.

"Micturate?" Shino pulled his cowl further over his face. "Spirit of Fire save us all." That boy and his words! Because Sai had that bishōnen look, people seemed to put up with his antics and odd behavior.

It was not entirely fair, seeing that someone like Shino was universally viewed as strange, despite his exemplary service to the community. Who said that life was fair?

"So... the answer _is._..." Kiba was drawing things out. Sai opened his mouth again, in a final attempt to explain the X and O quandary. He decided not to bother. "If you could readily recognized her handwriting the way Shino and I can...."

"_**ARF**!!! **ARF**!!! **ARF**!!!"_

"...And Akamaru can...." Kiba tried unsuccessfully to keep from smiling.

"O." Naruto's mouth actually made the 'O' shape. "I get it. Hinata." There was no way he could have made that connection de novo. He couldn't remember what the girl's handwriting looked like.

After that, Naruto said his farewells and ran off to find Hinata. Kiba and company went looking for Kurenai. Sai had acquiesced to Naruto's request to keep the crowd away, by any means necessary. The Nine Tail's jinchiruki could use some peace and quiet. What's more, he knew that Hinata was terribly shy.

Naruto came across Hinata while she was leading a large group of orphans towards an impromptu playground. She and the other helpers had their hands full. Those children who were recently orphaned were still quiet and reserved. The others, however, varied from quiet-and-polite up to loud-and-obnoxious. A certain blonde shinobi could see a bit of himself in all of them.

"Hey! Hinata!" Naruto ran over to the girl in question. He watched as three small children quickly pushed her back upright, after she began to teeter backwards. What was up with _that?_ It must be some kind of game they play! "It may see sort of silly, but there is something that has been driving me crazy all day!"

"N-N-Naruto-kun?" Hinata had no idea what he might be talking about. This time, it was _her _eyes that went wide when she saw the missing paper. "I... you... that...." How could she be so brave in facing Pain, and so cowardly now?

"So can you tell me what the X and the O mean?" Naruto stuck his jaw out. "And... while you're at it... will you tell me why _my _name is on the paper?"

"..." Hinata went momentarily cross-eyed. That had the children shouting in wonder, and one of the other nursemaids reaching for smelling salts. "Ummm... you see... it's...." There was no way that she could tell him the truth! Especially not now, with the children watching. "I can't right now. It's... well... it's My Ninja Way!" What a great move. He always respected someone's Ninja Way. "I'm busy taking care of the children. I take my job very seriously!"

"Good for you! That's what I expect from people I can like!" Naruto reached out to catch a falling Hinata, but the children beat him to it. "So... if I stay here and help too... you can tell me... _right!?"_

"..." and "..." and "..." Hinata's mouth worked like that of a fish. She had been hoisted on her own petard! But, her mind raced ahead again, coming up with a better idea. She hated lying, but she had no other choice. "Well... you see... we can kill two birds with one stone."

"Birds?" Naruto scowled. He looked down at his shoulder, wondering if he had missed a spot.

"Yes, Naruto-kun." Hinata nodded. "And stones. It's a saying." She smiled, shocking herself at her own audacity. "That is to say there is a way that you can help me with the children. It's play time. And I was just about to teach them a new game." She smiled when the children cheered. But, she felt a sweat drop forming, a sign that her sense of guilt was growing. She hated to use the children in her duplicity. Not only that, but the game she had in mind might be a bit much for the youngest waifs, even though it seemed deceptively simple.

"What's the game?" Naruto asked. He was echoed by numerous orphans. That had him thinking back to his days in the Children's Home. When large groups of youths had formed like this, he had usually been off somewhere on his own, nursing a bruised body and an aching spirit.

"Tic Tac Toe," Hinata replied. It was something that she had played with Hyuuga retainers, back when her father had kept her away from her sister and her cousins. "Naughts and Crosses. X's and O's." If she focused on explanations, she wouldn't have time to fidget over her falsehoods.

"I've never heard of that." Naruto hadn't heard of a great many games. Having been ostracized at the orphanage, he had done most things on his own, including his earliest forays up the Kage cliff with paint buckets in hand. "But Uzumaki Naruto fears nothing!" That was for the sake of the children. He was great with kids, possibly because he still felt like a child himself sometimes. "Because, that's... repeat after me... his Ninja Way....:

"**HIS NINJA WAY!"** The orphans were quick learners. With a bit of effort, including some sleight of hand and a gaggle of _Bunshin_ decked out like clowns, he was able to coax the most morose children to join in. He even went as far as to run off, buy some balloons, and fill them with water. It was amazing what a barrage of orphan-tossed water grenades could do to bring about a change of spirit.

"So," Naruto said, wring the water out of his hair. "What's this Tic Tac Toe?"

"Does it have Tic Tacs," a cute young girl asked. She had a splint on one leg and a patch over her eye. Nagato's sacrifice had brought the dead back to life, but did not heal all wounds or cure all ailments. "I like Tic Tacs."

"Tic Tacs for breakfast," another child chirped. "Tic Tacs for lunch. And Tic Tacs for dinner!" That's what the girl dreamed of, not what the Home provided. Hinata and the other helpers quickly addressed that subject. They didn't want any misunderstanding to circulate around the village.

Naruto experienced flashbacks. In his pathetic past, there had been days he would have traded his favorite toy for a Tic Tac or anything edible. That is, if he had ever had any toys. Somehow, the boy with the Fox never seemed to be able to keep fun, entertaining, or educational things for any length of time, if anyone had bothered to give him something in the first place. Yes, there had been a number of kind and loving caretakers. But, they had promptly been transferred or fired.

"Tic Tacs are candy." A little boy walked up and slid his hand into Naruto's. The orphans had been told of his deeds. He was someone the children idolized. What's more, he was someone the new generation of caretakers wanted the boys and girls to emulate. Realizing that, Naruto felt tears coming to his eyes. "Don't cry," the boy said. "It's OK if they didn't give you any." He reached into his pocket. When he pulled out his hand, he had a marble, a plastic frog, a bit of lint, and a bright green Tic Tac. "Here... you can have this...." He handed his treasure to the older boy.

"Thank you," Naruto said before sniffing. He wiped his eyes and put the candy in his mouth. There was no way that he wouldn't accept that gift, even though he felt bad about taking the boy's Tic Tac. He nodded when Hinata showed him that she had a pocketbook filled with all sorts of snacks. "I bet you'll grow up to be a fine shinobi yourself someday. It takes more than strength and courage. It takes kindness and generosity." Just about any ninja outside of the Land of Fire would have snorted or rolled their eyes at that remark. That was why they were what _they_ were, and he was what _he _was.

Hinata's eyes glistened, too. Just when she felt that Naruto couldn't possibly look more wonderful in her eyes, he always seemed to prove her wrong. When he turned to her and said "You're a good person, Hinata... doing something like this.... making someone's life better," she thought her heart was going to burst right out of her chest.

"It must have been very difficult, Naruto-kun," Hinata said wistfully, feeling melancholy thoughts of her own now. "I had a family... at least until my mother passed away. But... I didn't grow strong and determined because of my hardships... I became even weaker." Why was she thinking all this, now? Was it because she couldn't bring herself to accept praise from him? Was it because she still didn't believe in herself, even though she had stood up to Neji in the Chuunin exams and faced Pain in a real battle? Was it because she didn't want to get her hopes up, wishing for something she could never have?

"I'm hardly a genius, Hinata." Naruto smiled. He wasn't stupid by any stretch of the imagination, and had a way to come up with just the right plan at just the right moment. Most of the time. Well, when it really counted. "But I _did _learn something for all my troubles." He looked up at the Hokage faces. There was a father he never knew. There was a man who had been like a grandfather to him... a strong, kindly, and perverted grandfather! There was a woman he had helped fetch to be the village leader. That face had him thinking of Jiraiya. Before he knew it, images of Haku flashed before his eyes, followed by images of deceased friends and foes. "You and I both know that people can change,_ right?_ Well, good people like you and me, we aren't prisoners to the past. We don't have to feel ashamed for who we were...."

"**WE LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE!!!"** That was the children. They had been prompted by the adults in their midst, but they meant the words that they shouted.

"I couldn't have said it better myself," Naruto said, hooking his thumb into a loop on his jumpsuit. Then he realized something. "I mean... except for the love part...." He stumbled all over himself like a centipede in reverse. "Not that you aren't lovable...." His mind and tongue tripped over one another. "What I'm trying to say...."

"_**OOOOOOO-OOOOOO-OOOOO-OOOO-OOO-OO-O!!!"**_ That was the children, of their own accord. They clapped their hands happily, seeing both Naruto and Hinata turn bright red. Life was still very much like a fairy tale to them. The hero and heroine always fell in love and lived happily ever after.

"Hey! Who's for that Tic Tac Toe?" Naruto spoke in a rush. He couldn't look over at Hinata. He hoped that he hadn't made her feel bad. He shouldn't have worried. She found his actions to be cute. Not just cute, but also adorable, almost painfully so. The big hero. The shinobi next in line to be Hokage. The boy who had started off last in his class and stood at the very pinnacle today. Tied in knots over a simple word!

"Me." "Me." "Me too." "Me." "And me." "Don't forget me." "I've gotta pee!" "Me too."

After the nannies took turns taking the children to the restrooms... and Naruto got scolded for leading a bunch of boys to use trees, bushes, and a side of a building... they all reconvened on one of the few lawns that were close to maturity.

"I peed the furthest!" "I peed the highest!" "Naruto said I peed so good, I'm gonna be Hokage some day!" "When a man whips it out, he's got to whip it out with pride!"

"..." Naruto coughed to clear his throat. "I didn't teach them that last one!"

"So..." One of the nannies gave him a cross look that Sakura and Tsunade could be proud of. "...You taught them the _other_ ones...." When she made a loud _tsk_-ing noise, the other women joined in. Hinata stayed silent, but shook her finger at her fellow ninja. That had all of the little girls following suit.

"He's going to be Hokage some day?" A pint-sized cherub looked Naruto up and down and stuck her nose in the air. _"Hmmmpppfff!!!"_ That had everyone laughing and served to set the mood right again.

"So, it's time for me to pass out some paper...." Hinata had grabbed a number of notepads when she was inside the nearby orphanage, along with a box of sharpened pencils. "...And some pencils..." She drew two lines vertically, followed by two horizontally. "...And to explain the rules." She held the pad up for everyone to see.

"That's a number sign," a boy said, finger far up his nose. "I saw it on our typewriters." Strangely enough, one of the things to survive the destruction of Konoha had been a large number of typewriters sent to a scrap heap. Someone had the clever idea to give them to the orphanage. They made fine toys, and were a great educational aid.

"That's right. It _does_ look like that." Hinata nodded. "You're very smart!" She then taught them all the basics, saying that X went first and that players took turns, the winner being the one who got three in a row. As the children tried their hands at things, she gave Naruto more advanced instruction. "It really is a game best suited to children, Naruto-kun. When two talented players have a match and play their best, the end result is always a draw when they both know an unbeatable strategy."

"Sometimes ninja battles are like that, too." Naruto sat with his chin on his fist, looking like some wise old sage. He wondered why Hinata was quick to hide a smile behind her hand. "Except that each X and O can be another fallen shinobi." Even as fledgling ninjas, the world of missions and skirmishes had been anything but play. He tossed aside that morbid thought. "So... Hinata... are you going to share some of those strategies with _me?"_

"If you like," Hinata said amiably. "I can probably beat you most of the time, even if I do." She clasped a hand over her own mouth. Omigod! She had sounded so vain and conceited, hadn't she? Why was Naruto giving her a thumbs up, sans shining teeth? O. Right. He was probably pleased to see her have some spunk. "Stop me if you can, Naruto-kun!" That kind of banter felt good!

Naruto drew his own game grid and slid the paper in front of Hinata. He took a moment to scan the park area, smiling when he saw the orphans busy at play. Some had already switched to janken, or some other game, but all were smiling and laughing.

"You should draw your O's like hearts." That came from a bald-headed girl dragging a rather large floppy-headed doll behind her. She had been fortunate to get her anti-tumor treatments before the cancer center had been blown to smithereens. "You can't lose if you draw them like hearts!"

"I...." Hinata felt her face grow very warm. "Strategy. Yes. I can do that." She almost bit her tongue when she saw the girl turn and give her a wink. She put a hand on her cheek. Her feelings for Naruto weren't that obvious, _were _they? She didn't want to cause him to feel uncomfortable. He had been the only one to hear her confession. He had heard it and never responded. "Here are the most important strategies in order, most important first. Play to win. If you have two I a row, play the third to be victorious."

"Gotcha," Naruto said. "Play to win. That's my middle name."

"Ummm...yes." Hinata smiled. That had Naruto staring at her a bit too obviously. He had never noticed that she had such cute dimples. "Play to block. If your opponent has two in a row, keep them from getting three."

"Right!" Naruto grinned. He liked the way the corner of Hinata's lips turned up when she smiled. Realizing that he was thinking about things, he said "Three bad!" His voice squeaked ever so slightly. That had him frowning and Hinata laughing. His gaze sharpened. Hinata laughed. He had never heard her laugh before. Ever! Smile? Yes. Even giggle. But no laughs.

"Use a fork." Hinata was just as amazed as Naruto was. She wanted to laugh more. It felt good! "Create opportunities where you can win in two different directions."

"I'm good with a fork!" Naruto reached into his weapons pouch and pulled out Forkie. He would never let anyone know that name. Not anyone. Not_ ever. _"But then, everyone knows _that."_ He rubbed his belly and whispered 'ramen'. Trying to spin the fork like a mini-baton, he screwed up and sent it flying.

"Here, Naruto-kun." Hinata handed him his fork. "Have you been paying attention?" She raised one eyebrow. When Naruto stared at that, she stared right back.

"Yes. Sure. Of course." Naruto wondered why he was finding Hinata so fascinating. Maybe it was because he had never really bothered to look closely at her before. "Win! Block! Fork!" He swung the fork like a dagger, punctuating each word with a flourish. "Next!"

"Block an opponent's fork." Hinata reached out and grabbed Naruto's fork, laying in her lap for safe-keeping. She then went stiff. What if Naruto reached out and snatched it from there? She tried to tell herself to stop being such a prude. "There are two ways to do that. Number one." She held up one finger. "Create two in a row to force the opponent into defending, as long as it doesn't result in _them_ creating a fork or winning. Number two...." She almost snorted like a bull. Naruto had held up two fingers before she did. No. Not just that. He had held them up and wiggled them!

When Hinata went silent, it took a while for Naruto to coax her into continuing. He knew that she wasn't angry. She knew that he knew she wasn't angry. He knew that she knew that he knew. The two of them smiled, caught up in the mental gymnastic match.

"Number two...." Hinata waited to see what Naruto did. When he behaved, she held up two fingers, no wiggling. "If there is a configuration where the opponent can fork, block that fork." She returned Forkie to him, and went on to tell him about playing the Center; playing the Opposite Corner; playing the Empty Corner; and playing the Empty Side.

Once the two shinobi began playing, the experience became very much like one of Choji's potato chips. They couldn't play just one match, the way he that couldn't eat just one chip. Hinata won most of the games at first, but Naruto caught on quickly. Just before it was time for the children to go back inside, he had begun forcing draws.

"What have we here?" That was Ino. Sakura was with her. Their arrival had both Hinata and Naruto feeling uneasy for different reasons. "Naruto sitting still? Hinata still conscious?" She smiled, fond of each of them.

"Tic Tac Toe?" Sakura looked at the large number of completed game sheets held down by rocks. "I guess it's better than playing with a frog purse!" She knew how her past actions had affected her teammate. Truth be told, she might truly have growing feelings of love for him. But, it would take a long time for something like that to work itself out, whether or not the Council condemned Sasuke to death... set him free with no strings attached... or put him on some type of probation. She shivered, thinking that she could be dead now, if Kakashi hadn't stopped her, Kiba, and Sai from heading after her former teammate. "I doubt that Kakashi plays with a frog purse." If teasing was all she had available at the moment, she would tease her way back into his heart. It took little to hurt a person, and a lot to erase the pain.

"At least a frog purse is better than a blow up Sasuke doll," Naruto said under his breath, surprised that he could joke about his twisted friend that way.

"What was that?" Sakura had managed to make out what he said. Her _Inner Sakura_ was going bonkers. The words it used could not be used in polite company. "What did you say!"

"Nothing," Naruto replied, folding his arms across his chest and looking away. "Nothing at all!" Then, thinking it might be nice to have someone appreciate his cleverness, he whispered into Hinata's ear, telling her his retort. When she smiled, he smiled. When they smiled, Ino smiled. When Sakura saw all of the smiles that came at her expense, she began rolling a sleeve, murder in her eye.

"Hey! What's that?" Sakura stopped with her sleeve-rolling. Something had caught her eye, the item fluttering on Naruto's chest like a spastic butterfly. It was a piece of paper. He had safety-pinned it to his jumpsuit, keeping it out of habit.

"Huh? What?" Naruto looked like a deer caught in headlights before Sakura poked him hard in the chest, nearly tearing the parchment free. "O! This! Geez, this is the paper that had me at wit's end." He held back a nasty reply when Sakura said he didn't have to walk very far to reach his wit's end. In a somewhat surly voice, he explained the day's events. "That reminds me. Since my name is on it, you must have wanted to ask me to play Tic Tac Toe, _right?"_ He looked at Hinata, who couldn't meet his eyes. "But, why didn't you spell that out so that it made sense?"

"Let me see." Ino gently unpinned the paper. "O my. That's rich. That's really rich!" She made a mental note to her self to tone her response down. She didn't want to embarrass Hinata. It looked like the other girl had made progress today. It would be a shame to have things turn out to be one step forward two steps back.

"What!?" Sakura snatched the paper away rudely. She made a face when she realized what was going on. She handed the paper back to Hinata without saying a word.

"Well, is anyone going to tell me what's going on?" Naruto now knew that there was something more to the paper than he first thought. "Ino?"

"No," Ino said. "If anyone should do it...." She headed on her way. "...That should be Hinata."

"Sakura-chan?" Naruto looked at the pink-haired girl. She just flounced her hair and followed after Ino. "Sakura-chan!" He then turned to Hinata. He asked his next questions with his eyes.

Hinata went stiff at first. Then she began to tremble. Soon after that, she began to shake as if she were wracked by ague. The world felt as if it were spinning around her, slow at first but constantly gaining speed. Her throat grew thick and her breathing came in short gasps. Just as it looked like things were too much for her to take, she was saved by the bell. Not literally, but close enough. Sai arrived with bells on, as the saying goes.

"I believe that it would be prudent to get the children inside, immediately." Sai had been running, but didn't seem the slightest bit out of breath. There were times when Naruto wondered if he was some kind of automaton. "It would be wise for you to join them." That last comment was directed to Hinata.

"What about me?" Naruto felt left out at first. Then, his eyes narrowed and his posture changed. Was the village under attack. "Are we under attack? Who is it?" He watched Hinata run over to the orphans, feeling a slight pang of regret. "Has one of our allies changed sides?"

"It is not an attack, actually." Sai began jogging and motioned for Naruto to follow. "At least, not _yet._ You remember how you wanted me to delay the crowd, so you could have some time to yourself?"

"Yes." Naruto felt the hairs on his neck stand up. He had a bad premonition. "Did you do a good job?"

"I did," Sai admitted, thinking in absolute terms. "Then again, you may think otherwise when you evaluate my method."

"I'm afraid to ask." Naruto meant that as a sarcastic way to say 'Go ahead and tell me'. When Sai remained quiet, he said "Tell me already!" He put a hand to his ear. There had been a background noise, almost like the tinnitus a shinobi suffers briefly after an explosive seal explodes too close for comfort. That noise was growing louder.

"It seems that they are coming from that direction,too." Sai took off on a different tangent. "If we do not pick up speed, they will surround us."

"They _who!_ Damn it Sai!" Naruto cursed himself out loud. He should have known better than to leave any kind of planning up to the Root ninja. "Tell me what is going on."

"I had been reading magazines," Sai remarked. "There were many different articles. Tips on how to apply make-up. That was not useful for a guy. Ways to attract the members of the opposite sex. That was a trifle more interesting, but seemed to be lacking in many details. A list of ways to Make Dates Great. I wrote those tips down. I did not write down the Super Sex Suggestions or the Quick and Easy Guide to Marriage. I did look over the list of baby names, however." None of the names had jogged a memory. He still had no idea what his birth name might have been.

"What are you babbling about?" Naruto was feeling very frustrated. None of that made sense. Why had he thought that it would?"

"I was about to make my point," Sai replied. "I synthesized the data into an effective plan. I lied, telling the young women in the crowd that you were the village's most eligible bachelor, but were looking to rectify that situation. I implied that the hopeful Missus Hokages had far too much competition to ever have a chance with you."

"Annnn-nn-nd...." Naruto knew that he didn't want to hear the rest. Just the same, forewarned is forearmed.

"I told them to think up baby names. I told them that you would act as a judge, choosing the best name." Sai had been fascinated by the way that had quieted the very mob that he had stirred up. "I may have also implied that you would give the lucky winner the first chance at _needing _a baby name."

"You may have!?" Naruto could see people now. Numerous people. Countless people. Eager girls. Eager parents. Jealous boyfriends. People who thought they were heading for a rave.

"I was so caught up in my performance," Sai admitted. "I lost track of the things I said."

"You idiot!" Naruto "_That_ was the best you could come up with?"

"Well...." Sai cocked his heads. "I suppose I could have simply used X's and O's...."

"Gah!" Naruto wanted to stop and strangle Sai. His legs had a different idea. He ran faster and faster, leaving his meddlesome friend behind. He could outrun the other ninja's body, but not his voice.

"While this may not be the best time," Sai began. "Seeing that there is no one here to interrupt me, I will explain the X and the O. The author was only half-finished. When people write XOXO at the end of correspondence, it means Hugs and Kisses."

"What!" Naruto came close to tripping over his own feet. Hinata. His name. Hugs and kisses? Facing a crisis, his mind could not quite make the connection on its own.

"Isn't it obvious," Sai called out, ceasing in his efforts to run with his teammate. "Hyuuga Hinata is in love with you!"

It almost seemed as if time stood still. A larger than life image filled Naruto's thoughts. For the first time, the players and the play were seen as separate things. Words rushed in, pushing the vision aside:

"_**BECAUSE I.**.. **LOVE YOU.**..."_

Naruto took a tumble. A rather fierce tumble. Curled up like a ball, he had rolled a fair distance before bouncing hard off of a half-finished support pillar. A couple of loose bricks fell and struck him on the head.

Momentarily dazed, Konoha's most-wanted sat Indian style, stars dancing around his head. His ears were ringing, but that noise didn't drown out the words in his head. It was as if someone where playing an old time record, and the needle was caught in a groove, skipping: "Because I... Love You... Because I... Love You... Because I... Love You... Because I... Love You... Because I... Love You...

Naruto struck himself on the side of the head. The ringing stopped. His mind was quiet again. Standing up, he looked around him. He could recognize individual faces in the onrushing hoard. He didn't have a moment to lose!

"_Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!"_ Hundreds of shadow clones popped into being, carrying signs that read Catch me If You Can. "Hey guys, get going!" The ersatz-Narutos took off running in every conceivable direction.

The Bunshin would buy Naruto some needed time. It wouldn't be enough, however. No doubt there was at least one girl with chakra tracking abilities. He needed some place to lay low for a while, until everything calmed down.

This might be a very good time to pay a diplomatic visit to Sunakagure.

**FINIS**

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**Postscript**:

This story owes a debt to _Wikipedia_ and _Google_


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